It is sad some days in our society, but we tend to only hear things we want to hear or that are positive or happy. We often shy away from really wanting to hear another person’s pain. Yes, I understand fully why that is the case. It is not at all easy to hear some of the stories that we do.
In many ways, the stories connect us with possible experiences in our own life that we would wish and desire to never think about again. Some of the stories are so horrific, that our minds cannot comprehend all that we are hearing and so by disregarding them, we are insulating ourselves from that inevitable quandary of dealing with what we are being told. In some cases, it just may be too much to bear and sometimes we’re struggling enough in life, that we have little capacity left over to be there for someone else.
Consequently, survivors of abuse learn how to have one story that they tell to the public and one story they know deep down inside to be true. It isn’t easy for them either. After all, they have lived through the trauma of the abuse once and now in order to heal, they must once again live through everything over and over as if it was happening in the current moment. It is a lot to ask anyone to do and survivors of abuse have to deal with this trauma every day of their lives.
In many ways, if a survivor of abuse tells the public story long enough, it could become their truth. All too often, there are many who tell the story of the happy family because anything else is too much to bear. Yet, if you watch their bodies closely enough, you will hear a different story that is not spoken with words.
When people experience trauma and abuse, the body is the one that holds the truth within it. It is the one that has the experiences locked up deep inside the cellular memory. As the story of what happens remains within a person, so does the affect upon the body through its twists and torques and impacts from emotions, anger, stress and all forms of health issues.
If you watch closely, you will see it show up. If you watch closely, the body will tell the story unlike any words ever will.
For many people, it is too hard to face what happened. Our brains are good at protecting us and by doing that, they numb us to the experiences. The numbing allows us to rewrite life so that we can function and persevere in the face of overwhelming odds against us. Yet, that complete numbing and avoidance keeps us in the middle of pain and despair. It is the numbing and avoidance that allows us to tell the public story and hide from what truly happened,
By coming to terms with our public story and what truly happened as evidenced in our body, we can begin to take back the power that was taken away from us during the abuse. Until we begin this process, we will continue to hold ourselves hostage to what we experienced. The trauma and abuse works hard to remain hidden from view, but breaking the silence and allowing the truth to shine a light on our experiences will delivery us from evil and the hell we passed through.